#i am so tired guys. im so tired. im so tired im so tired
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SPEEDY SUMMERS, rafe cameron
social media & irl au pt.1 pt.2>
pairing rafe cameron x f1driver!reader summary after spending years all over the world racing in the world's greatest motorsports championship; you find yourself needing a break from the tiring world of formula one, so after the 2024 season, you return to your hometown for the offseason.
authors note hi hello! first fic on this account ahahaha... hope u guys like this! anyways this is set in a world where all the treasure hunts and yadayada never heppened because guess who's too lazy to write allat... if you read this and like it please do interact :)
p.s don't mind the face claim i use for yn!! it's just a place holder so imagine her however you want!
POGUES + YN
JAYJ 😈🔥
can u come back
ur my favorite routledge
pls
pls
pls
pls
Y/N
um umumumuum...
KIE BABY 💗
pleaaasee we miss u
JOHNNY BOY
who is we
i DO NOT miss it 😂
Y/N
ok so now i am definitely not visiting
besides im too famous for all of you lowlife losers 🤣
JOHNNY BOY
die
POPE !! removed JOHNNY BOY
POPE !!
what about now
Y/N
packing my bags as we speak!! ❤️
KIE BABY 💗
OMG YES
SARAH
this is so exciting omg i cant wait to meet u finally
my brother hates your team btw
Y/N
you i gotta meet this guy.. give him a piece of my mind
JOHNNY BOY
no u cant meet kooks
POPE
how the hell did you get back here
liked by landonorris, verstappen1, pierregasly, and 450,000 others
ynln officially offseason
tagged: jjmaybank, popeheyward, sarahcameron, jbroutledge, kiaracarrera
comments..
user1 where in the world is yn ln
> user2 carmen sandiego reference i see you
landonorris dont come back ❤️
>ynln why is it in my comment section
>>oscarpiastri the girls are fighting
jbroutledge photo credit?????? first slide????
>ynln no ❤️
kiaracarrera my babygirl is back 👅👅👅
>ynln YK IT 🫡
user3 casually places third in the wdc and just leaves the country
>user4 when ur driver is too nonchalant for the world
user5 WAKE UP BABE YN POSTED
RAFE & SARAH
RAFE
Yn is here???
You cannot be serious
SARAH
yeah
why? are u going to ask for an autograph 🤓
RAFE
Friends with a redbull driver… real low, sarah
#rafe cameron x reader#rafe cameron x fem!reader#f1#divierses#obx#outer banks#formula one#written by vie
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Hi! This is my first time ever requesting anything so sorry if this is bad. 😣😣
Can you do a Izek van omertà from how to win my husband over? (I love him so much 😭) Like we’re Ruby’s younger sister, we go to visit her, and while we’re there we get to know Izek. Can this also be platonic? Please and thank you! I love your work as well! ☺️
L I T T L E S I S T E R .
ㅤᯓᡣ𐭩 𝖨𝖲𝖪𝖤 𝖵���𝖭 𝖮𝖬𝖤𝖱𝖳𝖠 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝖠𝖥𝖠𝖡!𝖱𝖾𝖺𝖽𝖾𝗋
HOW TO GET MY HUSBAND ON MY SIDE
๋࣭⭑ֶֶֶָָָ֢֢֢𖹭 drabble . (1013 words)
sum. ruby's little sister decided to visit her one day, only to judge iske platonic
note : thank you for the request and nice words, anonie!! my first platonic fic, so idk if i did well but i tried! i also tried my best to write beyond just meeting iske so im REALLY REALLY sorry for changing the prompt. i wish i can write more but this is suppose to be a drabble, so i had to shorten the ending...
drabble request slots
ㅤ⪩⪨ m.list
“ruby, i don't like him.”
you muttered under your breath almost immediately after stepping out of your carriage, greeted by your sister and her imposing husband.
it had not been a minute, but you were absolutely certain that you did not like duke iske van omerta.
ruby's eyes widened, a mix of embarrassment and amusement flashing across her face as she glanced at iske, who stood baffled by your blunt words, but his expression remained unreadable (much to your annoyance).
ruby let out a nervous laugh, pulling you to her to give a quick hug. “you little—! you just got here,” she whispered sharply, her wobbly, embarrassed smile betraying her amusement. “you haven't even talked to him, and you already decided that he's the bad guy.”
“he looks mean.” you glanced up at the towering man with an icy glare of your own as you furrowed your brows, “and kind of ugly.” you could hear the screech of disbelief from ruby when those words left your mouth.
you yelped as ruby pulled you to her, as she covered your mouth with her hand. ruby gave a nervous and apologetic grin to iske, “she doesn't mean it! she's just tired from the journey—”
you struggled, attempting to protest against ruby's words, “no i'm not he's— mmph!” ruby's grip on your mouth tightened, keeping her stilling grin.
“she doesn't mean it!”
iske's eyes narrowed slightly, his bewilderment shifting to something more unreadable. iske did not know whether to be offended or stunned by the audacity of ruby's sister.
he could not exactly be angry since, well, you are ruby's sister.
iske was quite confident about himself as a duke and commander, who often instilled fear and rumors— however, being called mean and ugly by his wife's teenage sister was certainly a humbling experience.
though he did not show it, he was genuinely bothered by it.
iske raised a brow, folding his arms across his chest. “does she always introduce herself like this?” ruby let out another nervous laugh, still holding your mouth shut, “oh, she's usually much, much worse.”
“am not!” you managed to squeak out as you wriggled free from her grasps. as you stumbled on your steps, you quickly jabbed a finger to iske, “i'm being honest! you look scary! why does ruby always sing praises about yo— ow! ruby!”
despite iske's stoic demeanour while watching the exchange between ruby and her sister, something about your words seemed to pierce through iske's unshakeable confidence. his stature had stiffened since you called him ugly, and so did his sharp gaze.
when hearing that you were visiting ruby, iske actually put in a whole lot of effort to look neat, tidy, and sophisticated to have your approval after ruby said that you were a cranky teen that did not really like people.
ruby managed to calm you down from your crankiness of disliking iske, she turned her head back to iske—
only to find him leaning against a pillar of the manor, as if sulking. well, ruby assumed he was sulking, judging by his faltered shoulders and contemplating expression.
if anything, he looked troubled.
ruby could barely hear the mumbles coming from him
ruby paled to see iske having an existential crisis. she shot you a warning glare before walking to iske, trying to comfort him, “iske, don't let my sister's words get into your head! you're fine the way you are!”
iske is a duke, a commander, a man accustomed to respect and feared by many.
yet here he was, troubled by the blunt opinion of a teenager.
his wife's little sister.
it made him extra bothered when you really liked iske's sister, but not him.
during the duration of your stay, iske tried to appeal to you. somehow, that was. he always struck up conversations with you whenever you were around, which you found completely awkward and weird of him, unfortunately.
then he tried to appeal to your taste palette. he made sure that every meal from breakfast to dinner had meals that you were fond of, which ruby thankfully told him what you did like. that still did not make you like him at all.
iske had also attempted to give you tiny gifts. this was a strategy that ruby herself had told iske to try since you were quite fond of gifts.
he had started to look like a kicked puppy due to not having ruby's little sister's approval.
“this isn't actually bad.” you admitted to ruby as you raised the toy plush of an animal you were fond of, gazing at it with satisfaction. “see, he's not that bad, right?” ruby mused with a strange sympathy for her husband, who's been in turmoil for two days due to you.
you gave her a look before sighing, “i'm surprised he's doing all of this. the attempts to talk to me, the food, and now the gifts. he's a real weirdo.” you huffed out.
you returned your eyes back to the plush. after a long while of thinking, you pouted, “ugh, fine... he's not that bad. i guess he's better than the rest of the other choices father had for you.” you grumbled out, embarrassed to admit that iske is actually a good man for your sister.
as you prepared to leave, you decided to apologise to iske about your behaviour. despite your irritation and resistance (and probably protectiveness over your sister), you could not ignore that iske had genuinely tried.
you also had seen the way he looked at ruby. genuine love and care.
he was unlike those disgusting men.
you only gave a curt apology to iske. there was no need for grand gestures or for it to be lengthy before hopping into your carriage.
when you glanced out at the window, you noticed that iske's eyes brightened, like a dog. he looked at ruby with disbelief and pride. iske finally got your approval after three days of trying.
you could not help but feel a quiet sense of happiness, knowing that your sister will be fine with that weirdo.
・❥ want a hc / oneshot? please consider commissioning in ko-fi !
#⌞୨ৎ⌝ . fics#⌞୨ৎ⌝ . request#how to get my husband on my side#manhwa x reader#iske van omerta x reader#iske x reader#izek van omerta x reader#how do i tag a platonic fic#i love imagining iske trying his best to get ruby's sister's blessing#izek x reader#i forgot one more tag lol#PLATONIC THIS IS PLATONIC
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Fame and Fortune
Do you dream of glory? Crowds of thousands all adoring beneath you. The roaring cheers echoing in the arena. Countless of small white lights held up like beacons creating a sea of waving stars all for you. Breathless exhilaration has your chest heaving, skin glistening and damn. To feel like a god: never ending, eternal.
What would you be willing to do to get it?
What are you willing to sacrifice for fame?
Who are you prepared to lose?
Could the love of millions be worth the love of one?
——
[Backstage: Corroded Coffin Global Tour-Los Angeles, Ca]
Eddie is pacing, more than just pre-show nerves numb his hands. His cigarette burns quickly, ash falling on the carpeted floor, but no amount of nicotine filled lungs will fix this. Gareth, his drummer and long time friend, is watching him pace, eyes pleading.
“Is it worth it, Eddie?
We all got what we wanted; why are we miserable? You can’t lie to me, we all feel it. I see it in everyone, even you! You haven’t been the same since—“ He receives a withering glare from the frontman and sighs, speaking softer.
“I miss mom and my little sister. It’s been so long since I’ve seen them… I’m no longer drawn in her crayon family portraits, did you know that? Does Anne even remember me, anymore?
How can you keep going like this and expect us to do the same? I’m grateful—I really am—for you. You got us where we are now, a fantasy that we never even dreamed would become reality. It was amazing, I’m glad I got to experience it all with you, but I’m tired. I’m so tired guys.
I just want to go home.”
The long drag he takes burns his throat,
“Look, we’re all tired, I get it. Really, I do, this tour has been… particularly grueling I’ll admit, but come on. This is our last show, the big finale! We’ll give them all we got and then we’ll be able to take a break to freshen up before doing what we do best: creating kick ass music.
Like always. You’ll feel better after this, we always do after the last show—“
Gareth cuts him off, his patience clearly stretched thin.
“No, Eddie, listen to me! It’s different this time. I’m happy with the money we’ve made, we all have enough to live comfortably and I’ve been thinking that, you know, it’s time to settle down. I can’t do that if I’m always working. This, the band, it doesn’t… it doesn’t make me happy anymore.”
Jeff stands and his imposing figure makes Eddie pause from wearing a path into the floor.
“He’s not the only one, man. Im sorry, but its killing me. We don’t expect you to give it up either, you can keep the band name, find new members, keep signing… But for us? We can’t keep going, man. This is the end of the line.”
‘Not him too. Fuck. Fuck!’
“No! What am I—I’ve given up too much for this, you can’t just, fucking, bail on me!” This band, playing with his friends, it’s become his entire world. He’s lost too much to get here.
“Woah, woah, hey! No one fucking told you to and you know it. We’ve always had your back no matter what, but anything you chose to do is on you. Not us. The least you could do is extend us the same fucking curtesy and respect the fact that we’re fucking done with this bullshit.”
His gaze is venom as he looks at band, Grant and ‘Freak’ silent but agreeing with the rest. They refuse to meet his gaze.
“Fine. Do whatever you want.” He turns and leaves. They’ll be starting in 15 minutes.
Fucking cowards. Ungrateful bastards.
A memory plays in his head. Brief and intrusive. The voice of someone long gone from his life rings in his mind.
“I’ve missed you, Ed. Are you done at the studio, yet? When are you coming home?”
“Steve, this is important. You know this. I’ll be pulling a few more all nighters here—this album has to be perfect, baby.”
A crackling sigh is barely audible through the phone.
“I know, I know. I’m just being selfish. I’m sorry. Miss waking up to you next to me.”
“Miss you too, baby. You’re my world you know. Love you more than anything.”
“More than music?” It’s a timid question.
“Now, let’s not get ahead of ourselves,” he’s the only one to laugh into the receiver.
“Right… night, Eddie.”
“Wait, Stev—“ fuck. It was only joke. Whatever, he’ll apologize tomorrow.
Right now, he has music history in the making.
#take a break Ed Steve’s heart still waits for you#steddie#steddie headcanon#steddie prompt#steddie ficlet#steddie drabble#steddie fic#famous eddie munson#rockstar eddie munson#steddie angst#corroded coffin#bee speaks
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can you explain how daphne is lying about being with artyom? i hope this does not come off as rude! i am genuinely curious about this.
alright. now before the daphne dickriders come and get me, pls just read this with an open mind and consider what i am saying with what she is giving you guys.
i also want to apologize for any parts that are too hard to understand, russian is my first language. if someone needs me to elaborate on any part, i will!!
im aware i cant make ***everyone*** stop believing daphne, but this is just to clear it up for people who are still confused/curious.
daphne has made a few tiktoks in which shes talking about the 'letters' that her and artyom 'exchanged'. she cannot send artyom letters; russian prisons are extremely selective with who can contact a prisoner. you need certain information on the prisoner (like a prisoner id as an example), and chances are, only people with a higher power/close family can have those pieces of information. if you dont and try to send a letter, itll be sent right back.
another thing that i find suspicious is how she claims that she has photos of artyom that he sent her, but she doesn't wanna share them. her reason? "the shippers". she says the shippers who ship nikita and artyom will 'go crazy' with them or something, like w their edits or whatever. thats such a BS reason dude.
adding onto that, how tf would artyom even get a photo of himself...? hes in prison for life, he has ZERO access to the internet or anything like that, correct me if im wrong, but that would include cameras or anything like that.
this is more "me personally" why i dont believe she and artyom are getting married:
first of all, given what we know about artyom's personality, i find it really hard to believe that he would want to marry daphne (absolutely no offense to her, shes very kind and sweet. im just saying that i dont think their personalities would mix very well, given shes an astrology girl.)
and also, shes a foreigner. its not ***extremely*** rare for a russian to marry a foreigner but like... she dont know him. that also adds onto the letters; she is literally from another country, i find it extremely hard to believe that they were exchanging letters.
thats all i can recall as of right now, i woke up just a little bit ago so im still tired haha. i might add onto this later/add onto this if anyone else has pieces of information they want to add onto this
thank you for taking your time to read this!!
#academy maniacs#artyom anoufriev#nikita lytkin#nikita and artyom#guys people lie on the internet (shocker)
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i think there is just something fundamentally wrong with my brain that makes it and school not mix
#julia.txt#like i am TRYING. i am trying really hard all the time#and its not that i dont understand or im not good at memorization bscause i AM#it just. i dont know? it doesnt work#i love what im learning i love Being At Uni#i just ???? ????????? ???????????#ever since my last year of high school ive been saying THIS is the semester where i do well and it just. Never Is#i am so tired guys. im so tired. im so tired im so tired#i am so tired of spending hours memorizing having 0 social life because i just cant afford to#because it just takes me That Much Time to get through the material#and then i get to the exam and it just Doesnt Work#i am Trying to not be pessemistic about it but its REALLY HARD when it just Never Works#honestly this is The Area where my faith falters because i have been praying so hard forever and . well. nothing changes#i dont know what im doing wrong !!! i dont !!!!#anyways. enough complaining out of me im going to go work on my lab report. i guess.#sorry i have been A Downer these past few days lol
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Hi, feel free to take my new uquiz to discover what kind of vampire you are!
#NO IM NOT TALKING ABOUT CHESS THE MUSICAL I DONT KNOW WHAT THAT IS. I AM TALKING ABOUT THE ANCIENT BOARD GAME:CHESS#uquiz#vampires#twilight#because let's be honest there are a fair few references#and maybe this is my twilight quiz which has been in my drafts for nearly a year!#and i was tired of it sitting there#maybe!#quiz#werewolves#mention#you can get human in this im really sorry#it's a bit of a mean result#oh if anyone has an actual picture of the vampire that killed dean winchester please send it along#i could not find it with a cursory google search but i rememeber he wore a clown mask#so maybe one of those guys is the guy?
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Your face in profile, with a look I'd never seen
jjk atla!au with @philosophiums
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#gojo satoru#gojo#fanart#jjk fanart#jjk atla!au#atla!au: art#lmhs#every time i have to draw the veil i curse my past self fr including it#god bless the multiply layer mode but even she cant take all the pain away#i SUFFERED#the gd black fish too . die . >:(#im not convinced that this piece is as good as i Could have made it but i am so tired of looking at it#it needs to be done. i need to be done#the colours turned out rly well at least GHJHSGHSJGFD#anyway as i said this is fr all 4 of the dedicated lmhs gojo theorists smile#go nuts guys :3#i hear u ask. exasperated . 'what does it all mean hina !!!!!!!!!'#and to that i simply say#what do /YOU/ mean its just the stsg beta fish but atla flavoured :3#and that is my honest answer <3
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NO MORE ASSOCIATING THINGS WITH FEMMES ONLY BECAUSE THEY ARE PINK!HYPERFEM FEMMES ARE GREAT AND I LOVE YOU CAMPY FEMMES WHO EMBODY PINK BUT ALSO JESUS CHRIST CAN YOU GUYS NOT GO MORE THAN ONE DAY W/O TRYING TO SHOEHORN FEMMES INTO BEING ONLY PINK UWU BABIES. I AM FEMME AS IN GRASS AS IN DIRT AS IN TREE BARK AS IN WEEDS SPROUTING THROUGH THE SIDEWALK CEMENT. FEMME AS IN GENDER NONCONFORMITY AS IN FUCK YOU MY FEMININITY IS WHAT *I* SAY IT IS. FEMME AS IN DEPTH AND DARKNESS AND WARMTH AND TERROR. FEMME AS IN CAVES. FEMME AS IN LIGHTNING. FEMME AS IN AN AMALGAMATION OF TRAITS THAT I HAVE DECIDED ARE FEMININE REGARDLESS OF WHAT SOCIETY SAYS. FUCK IS IT THAT HARD TO UNDERSTAND?!???
#personal#i am emotional yes#over the years ive had this blog I've made a few posts abt being femme#nd whether they're serious or jokey..... inevitably someone in the tags goes “ohhh yeah bc pink”#or in the case of what inspired this post: someone going “what about the pink ones” on my praying mantis post#and im just.#sick of it. im sick of femme being equated to pink and frilly girlie behaviors.#im sick of femme being equated to skirts and heels. to makeup. to skincare. to pristine nails exactly almond shaped.#im sick of ppl acting like All femmes aspire to this shit. im sick of femms being reduced to this shit.#and i love pink! i love pink! my phone theme is quite literally just black and pink all over.#im just. so tired of any expression of Femme identity being shoehorned into being a Specific type of femininity#especially as someone who DOES get dysphoric wearing skirts. wearing dresses. embodying the femme aesthetic yall are so set on making#if u guys wanna rb this i truly dont care#i just needed to scream#and this is one small thing#but the 2nd largest category of anon hate i have gotten since making this blog is str8 up homophobia from other “queer” folks#saying i cant be femme bc of how i present. calling me slurs (and using them as such) bc they cant understand femme as anything but that#my wife and i have our users in our personal discord server set as 2 different things of anon hate ive gotten#i have had OTHER FEMMES tell me i am not femme. femmes who Know im femme who still call me butch. femmes who ive corrected and been blocked#-by bc of it. the number 1 largest demographic of queerfolk who have me blocked rn is TME femmes who embody pink also#and i dont think its a coincidence at all. (and i know this bc i go to try and follow these ppl bc they get rbed on my dash & i cant)#and ik their blogs arent deleted bc some of them don't block my wife (tall. white. butch) and it cant be politics cause her and i rb#a lot of the same political shit (fuck. i think she rbs More than i do even. this is genuinely mainly a nsft blog)#and usually i don't say anything but im having a bad day so i get to be angry about this and if anyone fucking tries me i will block u#idc if we've been mutuals 4ever. im judt so tired of feeling like i am not Enough as a femme bc i dont embody this shit#im sick of this lameass lip service to he/him gnc femmes etc when the thin white 50s housewife femme is still what is preferred and loved#im sick of this lamesss lip service when y'all feel entitled to theorizing on other femmes genders bc u cant conceptualize a femme who does#wanna be hypetfeminine. im sick of it. im sick of it. im sick of it.#celebrity bun
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really quick messy doodle bc im on a bus rn and this has been in my head all day lol
based on my own suffering and smthn i said today bc i was in pain </3
might post some more silly stuff bc im stuck here for the next?? 5 ish hours
#alex arts#tmnt#teenage mutant ninja turtles#rottmnt#rise of the tmnt#tmnt donnie#tmnt leo#rottmnt donnie#rottmnt leo#yes we love trans leo in this household <3#did you know turtles cycle is only once a year#god i wish#anyway i am losing my mind a little bc this bus was supposed to arrive at 215pm#then was delayed to 412pm#and only arrived at almost 9 pm#im so tired guys#but we ball#my travels#i think that was the tag i used like?? 8 years ago lmao???? when i was also travelling by bus and was drawing on it too#do kids still say yeet
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why do we continue to love bbc merlin over a decade after it's finale?
for the lovely @aemelia who made me giggle, and for @eddiediaaz, a very belated birthday gift because my writing is absolutely garbage and you deserve only the fuckin best of me. i love you, and i hope the next year of your life is nothing but beautiful and fun and everything good--you deserve the world, i'm sorry i can only give you this lil thing.
#ashley creates#merlin#bbc merlin#merlin bbc#merlinedit#merlingifs#alielook#xuserann#glitching#glitch#cw eyestrain#cw glitch#usershale#usersia#thebookluvrr1816#mialook#elenalook#i love the discord tracking tag channel bc i just scroll down it each time i need to post something i love u all#this took me a decade to make?? i am SO rusty im so sorry it took so long#im tired :)#love you guys#also sorry if it sucks#sigh bye#pandalikeelf
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PAGE VOMIT
#homestuck#god i wanna pass out but i need to. FUCKKKKKK#so much shit to do#clutches my head#who cares though. i am healing#clearly needed to get this out after whatever last week was#deep breath guys here we go#rose lalonde#dirk strider#rosebot#ultimate dirk#(‘s ass)#well. he’s there as a dragon too#i rescind tnat last that#Tag#i meant tag#not that#im so tired#also that wasnt that many to list. idk why i thought it was abotu to be a whole wall of names
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On the menu tonight:
#ninjago#ninjago fanart#fanart#lego ninjago#ninjago wu#garmadon#ninjago garmadon#ninjago spinjitzu brothers#spinjitzu brothers#art#I think about them alot#I am so tired#mannnnnnn these silly guys have a hold on my brain and im okay with that#IF lego dosent make more content of them I will#the maze of the sphinx is so good has got to be my favroite book out of them so far#me when garmadon angst krjheriugkjgdtthr5iguhvgnutuerhgnuerhntgu4ehiu
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i am a huge advocate of aziraphale being a bitch i encourage and actively support it actually
#LET HIM BE A FUCKING BITCH GUYS PLEASE#stop making him a fumbling clueless fuck i am so tired#he's passive aggressive he's snappish he's fucking bitchy and i love him more than anything#if u disagree lets fight in the comments im bored as hell#aziraphale#good omens#good omens season 2#good omens s2#ineffable husbands
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bug doodles so i can say i drew something
#oc#original character#alien oc#artists on tumblr#art#aliens#sketch#nyx#having a rough month creatively. and mentally. like a really really rough month. but i'm tired of saying that too#i made like three things this year i was excited about and that's it. where did the fun go. im supposed to enjoy it right#if i dont enjoy it then what is the point !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! of anything !!!! i dont enjoy Anything anymore even !!!!!!!!!#why is it already august. almost september. i dont even remember most of 2023 let alone 2024.#i got no drive to draw let alone to push through a drawing when it gets challenging or doesn't turn out right. i barely drew this month#just kinda hated everything. nothing is fulfilling#IF IM NOT HAVING FUN !!! THEN WHAT IS THE POINT !!! WHAT AM I DOING IT FOR#more and more i consider taking a hiatus from art. but what the fuck else do i do with my time then. what if i never come back to it#i got a list of stuff i could draw but either i try and i dont like it or i sit there and wonder why even bother because i wont enjoy it#guys im tired. im so exhaustingly overwhelmingly depressingly fucking tired and i feel no joy in my art#or videogames. or anything.#i need to go to bed
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At the beginning of your relationship with Dottore, there had been numerous times when he had tried to leave you, or rather, attempt to force you to leave him in the Akademiya. Ignoring you, snapping at you... most notably literally kicking you out of the dorm (to waking up and nearly stepping on you, as you had decided to knock out right at the door.) Merely because he still had difficulty believing he was loved by you, despite having known you for years. It took much time but, eventually, your feelings finally clicked in that genius head of his.
However, uncharacteristically enough, there was one time you debated on whether you should leave Zandik. Only one time. And he had found out. If only you had been more careful.
It happened during the later stage of your illness when your ability to do many basic tasks had been stripped from you, leaving you reliant on Zandik for many things. You felt very guilty, for making him so do much work for both himself and you, but there wasn't much you could do about it, being the way you were now. Did you tell your lover about this? No, of course not.
But today, today would just be another regular day of what you had accepted to be your new life. However, you had noticed in the morning he seemed rather irritated, but you had no chance to ask him about it since he had to leave for class. You wondered what that was all about. (You, somewhere in the depths of your mind thought. You were continuously being a burden on the knowledge-driven scholar, no wonder he'd be irritated.)
When he returned to the dorm, you could tell that the foul mood still remained. Though, you could not understand what had caused it. He was perfectly fine last night, something must have happened after you fell asleep... As you watched him, the words "welcome home" could not seem to come out as they usually did, especially when he had not even acknowledged you yet, only emptying his bag with all of his books and other tools. You swallowed nervously, wondering how you were going to go about this when he spoke.
"Where?"
"Huh?"
"Where do you plan to go?" You were understandably confused by this seemingly random question.
"Um... nowhere?" A nervous smile made its way to your face, as Zandik only gave you a blank look, before carefully unfolding a piece of paper, and reading it over once more, no emotion on his face. Which, was already quite alarming for you, because Zandik was the kind of person who always had a hint of annoyance written on his face. He then turned the paper to face you and you squinted, reading the contents.
Oh. You instantly recognized what it was. It was a form that one had to fill out if they wanted to move out of the Akademiya's dorms.
When you said you felt guilty for everything, you meant it. Meant it to the point you worried if you were still good enough for him, if you had become annoying, a bumbling nuisance that had become more of a chore rather than a partner. It worried you, and you couldn't help but think about it. What if you were right? What if he did feel all of those things? Then maybe, maybe you should relieve him of this burden. You. Then, he could continue to pursue his goals, without the added hindrance of taking care of you.
It wasn't something you were set on yet, more like something you mulled over in your head. But you had filled out the potential moving out form tentatively just in case you decided to go through with it. Ah, you probably had shoved it in your bag along with your many missing assignments, and Zandik must have found it after trying to check your homework... But now, your lover was staring holes into you, expecting an answer.
"Well, I- I didn't mean it. It was... just in case," you were just spewing words at this point because you really had no defense. After all, how do you explain to your roommate of many years that you were going to move out and disappear without telling him?
"Just in case," the scholar repeats. "Just in case..." And then Zandik laughs. At what? You're not sure, because you've only seen him laugh at other people's foolishness, or in scorn and bitterness. It's a bit unsettling, seeing him act this way, but you have no time to think about it before the paper is torn right in half twice and then abandoned in the trash bin.
"No." Well... alright then.
"Za-"
"No, no no no. How utterly absurd. Ridiculous. You are not going anywhere." The way he says it simultaneously sounds like an order to you yet also an attempt to reassure himself of your impossible departure. You wondered if he interpreted your reason for leaving as something more... drastic.
"Hey-" You stand up, hoping an embrace would calm his nerves, but he begins to pace around. Now, this wouldn't be unusual, he tends to do this while he's ranting or deeply thinking about his research but obviously, it's different this time.
"Leave? No," Zandik scoffs to himself, "the possibility is nigh on impossible. There is no need to plan for such lengths, I shall make sure it doesn't come to that." When he finished mumbling to himself, you tried to interject before his gaze snapped back to you.
"And you. You, how dare you go behind my back and do such a thing? Do you think me incompetent? Do you think me a senseless fool that I would allow you to do this?"
"..."
"I find this quite tasteless, especially after how much you parroted about 'always being by my side' or 'never leaving'. Or have you finally shown your true colors? Leaving me after-" Zandik cut himself off because the words he was going to say next shouldn't be said out loud. Leaving him after he's already obsessed with you, when he's already in love with you and would go mad without your presence. But then all he could feel was your arms around him and your face buried in his chest.
"Zandik please, I'm sorry," your voice was but a whisper. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean anything like that." Zandik's hands itched to hold you back, but he restrained himself, needing to hear your reasoning.
"I don't want to leave you, I really don't. I love you! So... that's why I filled that form out. Because I... am scared of burdening you too much. I know how you are. I know you want someone who is useful, w-who can be of assistance in all kinds of ways, not someone who is dead weight. So I... I don't want you to force yourself to- ow!" Your increasingly pitiful dialogue was interrupted by a flick to your forehead and the clicking of a tongue.
"Fool..." he moved his hand to rest on the top of your head. "You can be quite intelligent, but the reasons for your stupidity can be headache-inducing sometimes. Now that you've said all of that, has it clicked how idiotic it sounds?" Though your partner's words sounded harsh, his tone was noticeably softer. You could only cast your gaze downward as he sighed.
"I too wonder why you do not take your own advice. Were you not the one who said to... 'talk things out', before jumping to conclusions? So why have I not heard of this?" (The phrase feels out of place and rather disgusting on the man who normally refuses to hold a conversation on anything other than research, but he forces it out for your sake. Unfortunately, he can also hear your sing-song voice in his head as he replays the words.)
"Because... it's dumb, like you said. I shouldn't waste your time anymore..."
"I usually do not entertain dumb inquiries but... you are an exception. My assistant's questions must always be clarified." And as his lover, your troubles must always be assuaged, but that part was left unsaid, although you knew what he meant. "Yes, your usefulness was a great help, but I couldn't care less about that right now. I care about you, and if taking on extra responsibilities happens to fall under that feeling, then so be it. I don't care," Zandik said bluntly. Was it elegant? No. Was it truthful? Yes. It made your cheeks warm a bit.
"Well... thank you for the honor," you couldn't help but crack a tiny smile as Zandik only mumbled something incoherent before pushing you back to bed. Ah, you were feeling a little drained from all of that.
"Now that all that is sorted out, and that hopefully every inch of that nonsense has left you, I suggest you go to sleep quickly, unless you want to be kept awake by the sounds of my latest experiment." You only giggled at your boyfriend. He's unkind... in a kind way if that made sense. But before you could be whisked away to the land of dreams, Zandik spoke once more.
"[Name]."
"Mhm?"
"...Do not try to leave me ever again."
"...I know, Zandik."
#smooches talks#fragile reader <3#dottore love notes <3#divider by cafekitsune#another idea i came up with at 1 am (that seems to be the time my mind wont stop working unfortunately)#u dont understand im SO delusional abt them... sorry guys... f-fragile reader#im literally so tired rn ughhh... wah i just want dottore to cuddle me!! (i need to fix my sleep schedule)#but wow this is pretty indulgent huh!#dottore x reader#idk if i should put this in the tags but im feeling bold
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Thinking about Peter's absolute cry of anguish after the final boss battle when he finds Harry unresponsive. Thinking about how all he can say is I'm sorry. Thinking about the fact that in Peter's head it was him at May's side sobbing I'm sorry. Thinking about how "with great power comes great responsibility" can never be separated from the guilt Peter feels. Thinking about how that guilt extends to May. How it extends to Ben. How it cripples Peter so much that he tells Miles that he can't do this again. Thinking about Peter's voice as he'd begged Harry to fight - pleaded with him to not make him do this. Thinking about how when consumed with the symbiote Peter had screeched out I'm the hero, I don't get saved! Thinking about how that's not just pride, how that's not just responsibility, how it's guilt. How it's always been Peter and the weight of the world, the life of his loved ones, and their blood on his hands. And now it's Harry's and Peter just breaks. Always the hero, he's done the right thing, but this time it's the last straw. His best friend. The last sacrifice Peter Parker can take...
...and it's then... that Miles saves him.
#peter parker#miles morales#marvel's spider man#harry osborn#insomniac spider man#spider man 2 ps5#guys the ending blew me away it was so good#I am so tired and overworked but i want to write for this game so badly holy fuck#I just cANNOT get over Yuri's voice acting in that final cutscene is fucking 'harry im sorry' and then his absolute y e l l of pain#aND i DIDNT GET SPOILED THIS TIME SO I WAS LIKE Oh fuck Dont do this to him#like Miles is fucking incredible idgaf#Miles did what Spider-man could never do: Save Peter#spider man 2 spoilers#spider man 2 ps5 spoilers#i just keep thinking about and watching the ending im forever changed
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